When Egos are bigger than the Love for our own people

When Egos are bigger than the Love for our own people

03/2012

Disclaimer: This is strictly my opinion, does not have to me a match with yours, for each of us know “de la pata que cojeamos” (the leg we limp from!).

Throughout the journey of my life, I have had the blessing of having dealt with thousands of people. A bigger blessing has been listening to their utmost personal situations, be it on a personal level or in a professional setting. Now, I understand there was a common denominator present in most of the “problems”; the battle of the egos.

The Ego is something that interferes with and has the ability to cloud any situation and reasoning. Power struggles come as a result of the battle of the Egos. We see it everyday, we hear about it every day and sometimes we find ourselves in a position of just having to let go, for there is no way that one, as an external source, can do anything to make anyone change. That has to come from within.

Currently, we see the 99% vs. the 1%. There are many people who have not been able to take the time to listen to what this is all about. How could they?; when they have to keep their minds occupied trying to figure out how they are going to keep a roof over their heads and how they are going to feed their families! Makes me think of Psychology's Pyramid - Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, and those concerns happen to be at the bottom of the pyramid, (just one step above from physiological needs!). We, as humans, cannot step up to the next level on the pyramid, unless those needs are consistently met. Yet, here we have a 1% of the population squeezing the 99% mass for their own personal gain, with the power and sense of entitlement and creating the mirage for the 99%, to think or be convinced they are powerless.

The more one learns about self and humanity at a global scope, the more we are to understand that inflated Egos can destroy, annihilate and control the masses. No one likes to feel “controlled”; hence we end up with resistance! The famous phrase used by children for generations comes to mind: “You are not the boss of me!”

Everyone needs to have their feelings validated. Many of the things we see in our society have to do with the lack of validation for others' feelings. People declare wars because of Egos, imposing their beliefs upon others and of course, facing resistance.

The more one works towards taming their Egos, the more effective the communication, the more they will be listened to, where respect for others and their opinions will become that intricate link, even if each party stands by their position. People do not have to agree with you, but when you understand that they don't have to see life through your eyes and when respect is given, the communication becomes effective. That “agree to disagree” in peace, begins to create a domino effect and the doors of communication open widely.

All of us live a different reality. Each day brings forth its own agenda. Therefore, we cannot devalue the experiences of others, for only you know what you feel and what you think, and many times, only you have to try to figure out what to do; remembering that doing nothing is also a choice you are making.

Manipulation is married to Ego. Therefore, you have two elements to be extremely cautious about.

So, what is one to do? The answer is, be true to yourself! The best and most adventurous journey of all is that of self-discovery. Only then, will you be able to become the best of who you truly are!

Tai Pelli